Sylvanna Devlin

If you think of each field of study or work as having a curve between speed and understanding, intelligence is how easy you find either or both.

Are you a quick thinker?

Thoughtful about your work?

Or yes, both.

True genius is in having both about multiple spheres of interest. So while there may be some with quite a few spheres they can work with – genius also has a scale and you don’t get many who can understand multiple topics deeply and quickly.

Some yes.

But not many.

Plenty of people are still intelligent in their sphere(s). No one can argue a successful mathematician is stupid! Nor one who can do multiple kinds – or those who are also intelligent in other areas.

But you certainly do get some people who in times past would have viewed today’s astrophysicists as the village idiot (with the same thinking styles and abilities) because fishing was a bit challenging.

Galileo’s work does come to mind.

It has been taken for granted, by myself as well as others, that I can think quickly and deeply about quite a few subjects – some learnt at an interesting exponential rate. I don’t get any of it till I understand all of it. No wonder my intellect has been overlooked!

Speed of learning certainly can be a sign of intelligence, but is not the end all be all of intelligence. And what does one do with the student who seemed a bit slow and now has to resist correcting you!

My ability to work and understand almost everything I try – to the point I can become quick in multiple spheres, is indeed unusual.

I’m just like everyone.

So I’m not like anyone.

Thus I’ve usually related to others in their way and I seem kind of sweet but no one suspects how much I am capable of understanding, processing, and at what speed.

My father noticed my intellect but didn’t know what to think of my inability to settle on anything and exploration of everything.

My mathematical talent was taken for granted by me and irritated those who thought I was wasting by learning to write novels!

Now I’m returning to mathematics and find it as natural as drinking water. And as necessary for a very thirsty brain. It’s easy and I need to recognize that’s unusual.

I am indeed absent minded when it comes to my environment and physical condition. My brain is busy unraveling the universe and not really focused on lunch.

What I have come to notice that while mathematics is another language to me, that perspective is unusual. I find advanced mathematics so natural I had no real understanding of it being difficult to others.

It seemed easy. How am I supposed to know it’s supposed to be hard? It’s not like I have much chance to “talk shop”.

As annoying as some find that. I have been interested in literally everything and thus it’s been hard to narrow down on a field of study and work.

And while I feel I can bridge gaps between different fields – I’m at a point in my life no one wants me to.

People don’t understand what mathematical thinking is like, so they don’t value it. Mathematical ability is valuable to society however. Some other work isn’t.

But since I became quite good at writing an now have the structure for a ten year career of sharing my worldview through fiction. I am now interested in returning to mathematics because it’s another way of sharing what the world looks like to me.

Who is interested? Everyone. But that’s not really the only reason we learn to communicate.

Nothing is more natural than wanting to communicate a perspective or findings.

Anyone genuinely interested in the topic will at least be curious. You’re interested now as you’re reading this – oop just lost a few.

My mathematical communication, and myself, have been overlooked. It will take all my fiction career to share what I see about the world.

Now I need mathematics to share the pattern and abstract understanding I have witnessed. I see mathematics – it’s just not visual.

Try not to be too literal.

So far setting my intentions in the universe has been successful, but I have been so curious about everything I struggled to narrow down on a specific pursuit.

So back to college. I have a BA in communication and plan to pursue a masters. But I don’t see why I can’t get a bachelor’s of Science in Mathematics while I am at it.

It’s unusual but not impossible. I could do with peace with my presence however. Perhaps I could be viewed as the absent minded genius down the hall and be left to my academic studies.

And not viewed as a commodity. Maybe stop trying to get me evicted, to kill myself, or turn tricks.

I know I’m a woman and thus to some my intellect is unbelievable – women are just not mathematicians as far as most are concerned. If they really understand what that is.

Intellect is not valued, and some don’t value women either. So it is little surprise that the significance of higher mathematics is lost.

But

Who are you

To try to

Decide

For me?

You don’t consider whether women can be smart enough because you don’t consider it at all.

Okay.

I’m a highly skilled and highly disabled writer and Academia is calling. It may be possible that I would be drawn to research I’m interested in, or teach. Maybe pursue a PHD. I’ll just have to get that far and see.

I’m really not a bother so long as you are not bothering me first. I’m not your gold mine. What’s mine is not yours. And I should be left to study.

But I don’t expect you to change.

I’d like it.

But don’t expect it.

Please prove me wrong.