Sylvanna Devlin

Long story.

Upon those responsible.

I spent my Christmas evening trying to figure out how to rotate an image without photoshop, pixelmater, or G.I.M.P. (Gnome Image Manipulation Program)

These two need fixing

At least I have a recent (As in this Christmas) headshot when fooling around with makeup for the first time in about a year,

It’s the holidays and I’m contemplative

Sometimes I look completely different.

There were years in between. Look at the features and if measured would be the same. But separate mood? I look shallow and fake. But it’s just me with minimal makeup.

The other? Different but still with make up. And I swear you can see me thinking.

Sometime in 2018 I lost the life in me. By 2021 it was returning but,,,

Not amused

There are plenty of selfies to see as I progress: And the light is nearly there in all. People again tried to destroy me and with no sleep and the torment that goes beyond bullying? And I seem like I couldn’t possibly be the sweetheart people remember.

I don’t want to be the biggest dragon in the building but can be. Till I sense a bigger one, and can relax.

Meet me in person? The sparkle is there.

I’ve been sorting and organizing Data but the writer bug is done for, at least today.

I look like a wreck too.

So here is Tabitha again.

(Sorry for repitition jet pack is being hacked as I type this)

Mob mentality and “hehe haha” wind up the bipolar intellectual and isn’t it funny?”

Um no. Bullying like yours lead to a severe suicide attempt.

Let’s not make this common okay?

So what have you done?

So much I swore you were trying to “vanish me”?

“HeHe haha let’s make this person in a protected class worse and think she needs a med change

“Again

“Let’s make the bipolar person believe anything we want.

“Let’s make a mental illness worse

“Let’s see what it takes to drive her to the hospital again.

“Because hehe haha”

Fuck you.

Because, “oh no! I don’t want to live next to a crazy person. We made you ill and then complained about it.

“Why does your PTSD, Bipolar, dyslexia, and ADHD lead you to a soft spot with those who know you are still trying your best?

“I want to be in a protected class too!

“Hehe haha ‘I’m Sylvanna.’

“Hehe haha ‘I’m Melissa Devlin’

“The police won’t know the difference right?”

May you never lead a life with as much suffering as mental illness can bring.

“But HeHe HaHa you once had a job that made money. You father is an actual case of poverty to wealth – he did it, he doesn’t understand why you can’t.”

So which of these were real and which were “hehe haha gaslighting is bullying”

Vanishing a person?

Sending a cult after their writing

Attempted to sell into sex trafficking

Attempts to hook onto drugs

Attempts at brain washing

Forced virtual neighborhoods

Souring surroundings

Favors for fivers

Random comments from strangers

Dragging every potential enemy in an exhaustive stream of individuals.

Creating and using a gaslighting robot

Using private AI and stolen work just to wound

Reality abuse – “until she reaches oblivion”

Gaslighting – sometimes “to death”

Hacking oh golly, gee whiz the hacking.

Vanishing others with more to lose.

Basic regular abusive crap.

Chased everywhere by “Stalkers”.

Sound abuse

Sound used to torture- directly in a loud burst and through prolonged frequencies.

Commenting on private notes.

Threats of attempting to create a whore of the traditional kind

Threats of attempts on my life

Actual near attempts on my life?

Hurting/Stealing my cat

Thieving

Surveillance?

Standard harassment and bullying

Oop sorry – almost forgot? “We made you paranoid”

Oh yes sweetie. You did.

“mean we did these things and made you believe anything we wanted.

Mob mentality and “hehe haha” wind up the bipolar intellectual and isn’t it funny?”

It took six lines and tubes in my body to rescue me.

No one new how to bill for a surgery so new I really might have been a first in Oregon,

“Let’s see what it takes to drive her to the hospital again.

“Because hehe haha”

Fuck you.

Oh sorry, I forgot

Because, “oh no! I don’t want to live next to a crazy person. We made you ill and then complained about it.

Why does your PTSD, Bipolar, dyslexia? And ADHD lead you to a soft spot with those who know you are still trying your best?

I want to be in a protected class too!

Hehe haha “I’m Sylvanna.”

Hehe haha “I’m Melissa Devlin”

The police won’t know the difference right?

May you never lead a life with as much suffering as mental illness can bring.

“I mean we did these things and made you believe the weirdest theories into why. You should be in a hospital or dead.

“Hehe haha right?”

Let’s not make me into Geiger art again shall we.

Because you know it’s fatal. But a mob means you can hide behind each other. So which one of you with a cumulative affect of your abuse actually killed me?

Sorry attempted Murder

We share it

Here’s the bottom of the bullshit.

The lies, the reality abuse, the gaslighting and evil in-between is appalling, Oop I meant apparently about my book from the victims perspective.

From Reactive abuse, the evil in-between.

Dear ladies, as it seems to be all pissed of women – talented in other ways so they should own their shit before dumping it on me.

Every “enemy” hauled out, things stolen, professionals hired. The cult, the brainwashing all this bullshit?

About a fucking book?

Are you fucking serious?

Game Over

Older picture by a few days

I promise we’re both still alive.

Though I suppose a kidnapper wouldn’t say that.

Well maybe they would just to throw you off.

Then the next so forth.

But no one is that tedious.

Right?

With 92 hours awake and 2 hours of sleep at some point madness easily flows. Add to it intense narrative based reality abuse! One disconnects from everything.

Slipping, sliding, flowing stories swimming around each other. Real sounds only some can hear. Characters, plots and plans. It all begins to blur and a dream world makes more sense than the physical.

Until you are left in oblivion.

You cease to exist. Reality becomes a red river of lies above and the blue truth below flowing in an opposite direction. And you are between, floating on both as up and down really has no meaning anymore.

You’ve been reduced to perception alone and any moment now you will cease to exist entirely.

A life raft of words is sent and you’ll call upon your nemesis if you have to, anything to reconnect. Even surrendering to the lure of an abusive, controlling individual with an unusual affect on women.

Unless they were around all the time for years. Then they fear succumbing to crocodile tears and nuerolinguistic programming.

Maybe he improved. I don’t know.

Then you get some fucking sleep and overhear complaints, “you said she would be in the hospital for weeks after all that”

You write about it and someone says, “you think Nepenthe is you? Come back to reality.”

Oh if it were only so simple. And Reactive Abuse less popular in women. Perhaps my book will change that. Perhaps losing a weak form of power is truly the issue at hand.

And I was sent to Oblivion to be destroyed.

Game Over

The name of my book and my current mood.

I am Nepenthe as described as the version in the song – one I’ve never heard. But they knew the story too well for us not to be the same woman.

And reactive Abuse has made me look ugly and angry when I would prefer to be kind and gentle.

“Do you look good enough on the outside to feel good on the inside, yet?”

Please God, get me away from abusive women I’ve never met, pouring nastiness and frustration with security I just don’t understand.

Maybe trying to Vanish me was a bad idea.

Published under Melissa J Devlin

Game Over.

The game changer.

And just possibly the reason Games are being played with my head.

Oh by the way? The hair and glasses thing is real – no makeup required.

Golly I look tired!

A snapshot of “oh who cares about the perfect one right now. Maybe I’ll do myself up for New Year’s Eve!