Sylvanna Devlin

“I’m Just joking.”

“I Just said one thing.”

“I only (fill in the blank).”

“I only searched”

“I only stole one thing”

“I only broke something small.”

“That’s just gaslighting”

“It’s just a threat”

You even play games, like I am a toy. “Let me try…..”

Cumulatively you’re killing me

And when I point out you want my suicide?

“Don’t talk about that”

“We’re tired of that.”

Rebuked?

“Some angel.”

You cumulate and harass, words that should be innocuous becoming thorns in the mind, and then claim you either care or are just “tired of hearing it”

Even “go to the hospital” is used to harass me – so how am I to tell? I can’t “come back to reality” when you sound the same.

You might care, but the robot is just prepping me to have the rug pulled from under me.

There are at least 8 maybe 9 voices from the trollbot – saying the same so there’s no way to know what’s manipulation and what’s the concern of a passerby.

I can’t go to a hospital- it’s not just that some say they have plans to loot my room. It’s that the trollbot follows me and harasses everyone- some even more vulnerable than me.

Music none of us control rings through- and I am both driven mad by it, and by requests I stop playing it. Stigma and scapegoating mixed with reality abuse.

Some are responding to a bot themselves. I can be calm and quiet and they still have to say something to me when I haven’t said anything. You said you’ve been listening to me for twelve hours?

I haven’t been awake more than 5.

You are all listening to a bot and calling me crazy for it.

But I do appreciate those that get through that they’re real and just care – even though they don’t know me.

You claim I have no self control

But I am alive, thus far.

And many “just have one thing to say”

Because they can’t help themselves and hold their bitching tongue.

They are, together, harassing me.

All seem to have ears to hear but not listen

But some are beginning to understand

If all my blog contains is proof of reality abuse?

And many are laughing about what I’ll believe next?

Then?

“Come back to reality?”

I should kill myself

Because I’ll never have the truth again.

But calm down, stop ganging up on me. And I have a chance.