• I was a writer. Now I seek more to life.

    I have welcomed the eyes of law enforcement for four years. Starting with an upload.

    Earlier this past year I at some point publicly announced I welcomed American intelligence services to watch my entire digital signature and they had permission to use said signature – including work. To stop and prevent criminal activity.

    I would call terrorism pretty criminal.

    Now they don’t own it – yet. It utterly goes to them upon my death. But for now in tandem I’m free to write, and generate an ever growing digital footprint.

    They are my books to edit and complete. They do not belong to the American public. They’re never going to because there are limits to the freedom of information act.

    No one has permission to develop them, edit them, steal them. Or shit on them.

    Frankly.

    Keep your shitty 8th grade level AI away.

    As a result of being watched, (with my permission), everyone felt entitled to follow Joshua Sonnikson’s interest in what was becoming an ever unified law enforcement intelligence pool.

    Systems talk to each other because the threats out there are severe.

    And one of them is Joshua Sonnikson.

    But he’s gained cult like favor for “exposing” leaks in the system. Leaks that asshole and his hacking GUI created and he gamified the use of.

    He was a consultant, like Snowden. And my opinion on that guy aside. He went global by going to the news. Not a proof of concept push to drive a person to suicide.

    Yet everyone blindly follows the comparison because they “don’t see the harm.”

    Look, you little assholes.

    Our national security depended on secrecy and the police scanner isn’t Facebook. The police need to operate in privacy, as does the FBI, as does the NSA. Etc. and So forth. Transparency is a bullshit concept you’ve all proven is more destructive than anything else.

    Congress has oversight. You don’t trust them? Vote.

    But you’re all warm about a sociopath whose proof of concept was to try to get the general public to kill his ex, semi romantic partner. Me.

    Now you’re widening security loopholes he created and you feel justified doing so. Following your cult masters lead into trying to kill me like it’s a biblical event.

    And if you don’t stop? The destruction of America will worsen and never recover from a certain presidency we hope is just worked around more than worked for.

    It will certainly feel biblical.

    While this started under Biden’s watch. Now Trump is technically in charge you act like you’re somehow justified in shitting on anyone helping the government in any way. And a writer who didn’t mind intelligence services seems like fair game to you.

    What the fuck is wrong with you? Too entitled to think? Believe the constitution isn’t something worth protecting? My right to privacy invaded because you don’t even know what it says.

    We have individuals in the public and government practically wiping their arse with copies of it I beseech you to have a significantly higher degree of respect for it.

    Those assholes belong to temporary politicians and vigilantes everywhere. Have some sense to wait this out and stop digging your claws into loopholes and glorifying a traitor.

    You have questions about oversight? Call your regional senator’s office. Don’t glorify that asshole and stop sharing his targets because of some bullshit “some eggs have to crack” mantra that is distinctly un-American. This is “no man left behind” land. Not “ends justify the means.”

    God I want to hide from you
  • I was a writer. Now I seek more to life.

    Well. Contact.

    My left eye’s distance is fine so my right eye gets the adjustment. For reading – so I can still see well enough.

    Meh. I look okay. Have some plucking and waxing to do!
  • I was a writer. Now I seek more to life.

    My brain: Let’s do the thing!

    Body: Na too tired. Let’s rest.

    Brain: Can’t rest. Bored.

    Body: Too bad!

    Brain: . . . Let’s rest.

    Too tired to think!
  • I was a writer. Now I seek more to life.

    There’s a “soundscape” I dubbed popcorn music because it made my brain feel like it was exploding into popcorn. It’s hard to describe any other way because it’s more than misfiring neurons. And for me it use to induce rage instantly.

    That I wouldn’t let out but dissipated when the sound stopped.

    Another frequency induced suicidal feelings whether one had any plans or not.

    I felt them last night, together. But mot as on fire as it has been in the past but it’s a dangerous combination that is relieved as soon as the sound stops.

    If you are experiencing sudden anger or a sensation there’s something indescribable wrong with your brain it may be an inaudible frequency attack.

    Same with suicidal feelings out of nowhere.

    Earplugs won’t help because it’s directly fucking with your brain. It’s something you experience not hear.

    I don’t have another suggested solution other than to get away. Go to a friend’s. Go to the hospital.

    I think by now they might even know what’s happening when you say, “my brain feels weird and I suddenly feel like dying.”

    I know a few would be annoyed by me saying the hospital might help, but frankly it’s better for everyone if I stay put because the trollbot follows me there.

    We do not need a building of people recovering from psychiatric events to be attacked by that weapon of mass suicidal induction.

    It’s a dangerous tool and some people have access to “just seeing what it does” because they don’t realize it’s like firing a gun because it’s a new weapon and bullets seem “unrealistic.”

    Please don’t play with the trollbot because it exists to put brains on fire so whomever you set it on might not survive.

    And it will be because some assholes was “just curious.”

  • I was a writer. Now I seek more to life.

    I know. That joke was terrible.

    Because the Portland skyline is bathed in the most beautiful light!

    This is the classic shot

    But

    This is where I stared

    And this

    Not too shabby

    Thank goodness for AI that mostly ignores screens!

  • I was a writer. Now I seek more to life.

    Better than instinct I suppose.

    So far the lingering communication lines has women obsessing over every crumb of potential gossip – particularly if it’s remotely about me. No matter how inaccurate.

    And men want to know why I’m obsessed with that topic and half the time it’s news to me that there’s something to be said of a topic.

    So my apologies to anyone passing by of remote interest to gossiping geese because apparently sheer proximity is enough to stir up wild speculation

    PS

    On a separate note. Try to remember how important it is to know the computers name – in Unix specifically. But generally it affects things.

    ….

    No reason

  • I was a writer. Now I seek more to life.

    I wrote a book under my legal name. It was about my marriage, its demise, and the reactive abuse they used.

    I much longer ago had an ex who in more resent days became a consultant for intelligence services.

    Women loved him like they would a cult leader for reasons described in earlier posts.

    Reactive abuse is mainly used by women and passive aggressive enbys.

    Joshua was part of the creation of a hacking GUI and AI and made it accessible to buyers.

    People like terrorists and foreign operatives etc. And his proof of concept was to do as he did to me.

    But while I did kill myself, I didn’t stay dead.

    Indeed the concept and capabilities were all exposed wiping out on me. Even his current identity. And it exposed his cult like status with women.

    Women who use reactive abuse.

    Women who find me a threat to their power and support a terrorist just to piss people off. Play stupid so we waste our breath on stupid arguments. And distract from the main issue.

    Joshua- Andrew and his Hacking AI with easy GUI.

    And his customers.

  • I was a writer. Now I seek more to life.

    So…

    I’m okay

    Just exhausted.

    I feel as Tuckered out as Tabitha

  • I was a writer. Now I seek more to life.

    Manipulation

    It’s the last weapon of mass population destruction and they’re getting away with small scale experiments.

    Manipulative individuals training for psychological operations. Who appear not to be able to take responsibility when caught so everyone wastes their breath listening the ways they were cruel. How they can lead to suicide.

    And what can they do but comment on my dyslexia as I write. But squirm because they know it’s wrong but playing stupid has so far gotten them what they want.

    What great wrong? Let me share the consequences first:

    .

    Inability to stay awake

    Inability to concentrate

    Inability to physically heal correctly

    Inability to maintain psychological health.

    Psychosis

    Suicide.

    .

    I’m at stage 2. Hoping promises of stopping abuse means all abuse from their terrorist technology.

    So what has happened?

    The same technological infrastructure put in place to enable psychological operations – more clearly and directly trying to induce suicide is being used by individuals either to stupid but have paid for the opportunity. Or who think they’ll get away with murder.

    I’ve gone in to what it takes before. Because it was everything from a tobacco tin sized transponder slapped against metal to reverberate signals. To placing google plays. To more direct commandeering of others computers, televisions, anything that can be hacked and produce audio- even if that’s supposed to be just an alarm.

    It’s probably still all a very clever manipulation of Bluetooth. My stalker in chief set up an elaborate system to drive a person mad. And even reduced to nighttime manipulation the users will achieve the objective.

    Mass suicide

    Mass inability to work.

    A Sommulant population, and a dangerous environment for those whose job it is to use heavy machinery.

    All from REM manipulation

    You can tell they know that what they’re doing is wrong – or they wouldn’t fight so hard to silence me. They’re torturing me right now.

    A game of paranoia to some, psychological warfare in actuality, and training ground for manipulative individuals already one step removed from morality.

  • I was a writer. Now I seek more to life.

    Sorry

    Forgot the “I’m breathing” selfie.

    Been sleeping and look it!