Sylvanna Devlin

I have two goals as far as my occupation goes. My mind wants to be a psychologist doing research into a certain problem. And my soul wants me to aide others in their spiritual lives.

Physically I can dance all I like. I never intended it as a career.

But it was my soul that kept my body alive last year. I had to regain physical strength and am still working on it. Or really only just getting to the point I can.

My mind had gone to heaven and God sent me back. My soul was calling me into my body. The surgeon had saved my life. Now it was time to reach for my potential.

I am not at “max” level yet. My instincts are there but with my sister gone and the abuse continuing I had a crisis of Faith this morning.

It’s not that I doubted God exists. I’ve met him. It’s not whether I believe in him or not. I have knowledge where most need faith. I never need doubt God exists again. I was concerned I couldn’t do as promised.

And this morning I didn’t want to.

It felt like my soul had been vanquished. I stopped loving everyone and everything. Let people struggle. I was done.

My mind would continue on.

Thank you.

I completed a private ritual and chose the path of spirituality by instinct.

I was not dead inside.

I was sleeping.

I let my body rest and my mind eased. My soul insisted that it was okay that I needed time. I have that book to write anyway. But we had reached a turning point.

While I could continue to study academics I needed to focus on my spiritual world. Keep an eye on what grief does. I had to keep the main path that of the soul.

Writing those books.

Reaching for my potential.

So in addendum to “A problem and a promise” I must remind you that sharing the kindness of my soul was already promised. And while I feel I must do both. Laying groundwork to God is my priority, even if I stumble.

I do need to study and aide where my mind sees a problem. But while I can observe it. So what?

It is my soul that offers a solution.

And it is to a greater audience.

I’m here to help. I returned to life to help. And I am nothing without the promise my spiritual life must come first.

I will return to loving everyone and everything after a little time licking my wounds. The capacity is there. But I am wounded and need time.

I’m not giving up on you.