Sylvanna Devlin

When we’re upset our bodies are ready to squabble and it makes us more sensitive to likely causes of further frustration.

If we calm our bodies from the “aggro” chemicals running through?

It at least helps us survive an onslaught.

Live or Automated.

I’m still working on self soothing that doesn’t involve self talk and muttering jokes. Someone who cracks a line in the worst of situations might sometimes be so misunderstood people think they’re awful.

Which explains the English.

Here’s what I have to address the physical stress of intense ire.

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If you can (yeah right) let it run down on its own while taking a nap.

The older you get the better naps are anyway.

So if you’re too old to put up with shit anymore? A nap might help.

The acute trauma method of settling down is to just see and say ten things in the environment. And for some anger is traumatic.

Maybe slightly for all depending on the level.

Our bodies “think” we have been in a fight after surgery. Even minor ones like a bad gallbladder which is f’n painful to experience but simple to remove.

Omg was that necessary and aided me greatly.

But for a while my mood was everywhere because physically I had been wounded and that’s all the sub-psyche understood.

When we are so angry it hurts. When we would like to end the world or kill ourselves we might not care which if we go beyond fury.

And these days there’s no f’n outlet. So yes. It’s traumatic as fuck.

Ten things, then ten more,

Moving on:

Focus! If you can. Hyper focus on a project! Ignore the fuck out of the world – if you can. (ADHD helps)

Mantras are easier than prayer and regular meditation. You don’t need a traditional one. Crafting your own can be calming. Then mutter it as you can – if muttering is an option!

Cats

Coming up with ideas – ideas that are more constructive than destructive.

We all don’t really like getting destructive unless in a mood (some people are always is a mood)

It sounds stupid. I hated the idea because “oh yeah?” But aromatherapy works. Screw “lavender is for….” Pick or mix a scent you find heavenly. (Not only do I hate lavender I’m allergic to it. Omg!)

Listening to a voice we find soothing. Different for different people plenty of actors, radio’s personalities or audiobook narrators have incredibly calm voices.

I discovered at some point content is near irrelevant. (Unless Neil Dygres Tyson whose voice is known to be calming but is almost aggrieving in how calm it is!) the series repeat he did is good for settling down (cosmos I think)

Anyway, a soothing voice works.

But when it comes to music skip Midori and Enya. Because as much as we love them. They’res something frustrating when we are that angry.

listen to meditative type music once you’ve calmed some.

Super hot situations can call for a thunderstorm.

While the babbling brook track helps with sleep. It does nothing to stop being pissed off.

It’s possible it’s a former Colorado/UK NW thing, but by god I find the sound of thunderstorms helpful.

I feel alive, and fierce, and calm down, at peace.

Exercise, the world’s most annoying suggestion. And always advised. So super irritating. Can actually work. Going for a run with proper form. Long bike rides or dancing to “f off” music – even if you’re mostly sitting.

It’s not accessible for everyone. Health, exhaustion, sheer reluctance.

But if you can burn off the stress fight or flight it helps.

If you can.

It’s not a failure on your part if you are skeptical on that. Everyone feels that way.

I like to sing in show tunes style. The more upset the more stage ready it is. But it prevented a heart attack so I must recommend getting silly with sound.

I found, sadly. It’s true swearing in the short term helps. But long term- as psychologists have pointed out. It mostly escalates everyone ourselves include.

Sometimes it’s hard to avoid! OMG

But not productive or conducive to calming the body.

Some gentle bursts of rant to the air can be like a release valve at the time. But you usually are embarrassed afterwards no matter how reasonable you were.

I still reach that point!

This all seems slightly inaccessible when raw as F! But give it three minutes. A three minute timer. (It’s not just to give space for wallowing) use and egg timer so hopefully you don’t notice you have gotten going and keep going.

Some of us have to lure part of our own psyche into the forefront!

That’s what I can come up with for now. But I’ll work on more ideas.